Tuesday, July 24, 2007

So, as you may or may not know, I let my driver's license expire. Dumbass move, but I'm a little bit of a dumbass as it is.

I went with my already-3-year-expired license (which was an Ontario G2 license, by the way) to MPI to try to get it renewed. The guy decides I need to prove I'm a Manitoba resident, so the only thing that will satisfy him is a copy of our apartment lease!!!

Fine. I go get it and go back to MPI. Then, after another 10 minutes, he finally realizes the Ontario license is expired! DANG! I was so so very close to getting away with it!

Then I'm told I will have to do the written part, or the 365, or whatever the hell they call it now, again. Guh. And then a driver's test. Double guh.

So the next day, I go to the Driver's Testing Centre to write my 365, where they hand me a pen and a sheet of paper. I was flabbergasted. Gob-smacked. Just plain old speechless. So I says to the lady: "Dontcha have computers for these things?" Apparently not. They're coming in several more years. Now, when I was in Ontario and 16 (which was like 500 years ago) and I "wrote" my 365, it was a multiple choice computer test. Wow. WOW. Wowzers.

Anyhow, I got 4 wrong out of an allowable 6, so yay for me. I guess that's alright after just glancing at the driver's handbook the night before. The really stupid part was that there were 2 questions about fuel efficiency, which I got wrong - of course. Fuel efficiency?? Are you kidding me??? On a driver's knowledge of the-rules-of-the-road test?? BLEH! Who cares what the percentage of more fuel burned is when you go 20km/h over the speed limit! I sure don't! Also? I had a question asking me what colour order the lights were in, from top to bottom on a traffic light. Now that's my kind of question! And for all you people who may not think so, I did actually get that one right.

So because I already actually had a license, expired or otherwise, I could book my road test right away without the how-ever long waiting period.

So Monday rolls around and my test is for 7:45 in the morning. Do they even open that early?? Crazy! First, I get there and it turns out I've forgotten to bring my license with me! My gawd, I am such a moron most of the time. The guy gives me 10 minutes to go get it and come back. I make it back with 2 minutes to spare. Heh.

So I go through my driving test, through no less then 349 residential streets, all with at least 9207 parked cars on the side. Guh. And for the parallel park? The car is 2.5 meters long. The space was 7.5 meters long. The guy just let me barely back in, then he was all "whatever, good enough, let's go," without letting me straighten out. Okay buddy, fine with me!

So. The maximum number of points before you fail: 50. The number of points Winnipeg Damsel got: 50. As if and whatever. Apparently I don't signal and check properly before moving around parked cars. Look Winnipeg: I've seen the drivers you give licenses to, so STICK IT IN YOUR &^$&*! And rotate. And then smoke it.

Anyhow, you are now looking at a fully-licensed (not any of this graduated licensing bullshit!) Damsel. Mwahahahaha. Ahem. Anyhoo...

3 comments:

Heather said...

Congratulations on being fully-licensed (again)! And thanks for the reminder, I just looked and my license expires in 2 1/2 weeks!

Anonymous said...

If I remember right, I think "STICK IT IN YOUR &^$&*! And rotate. And then smoke it." was pretty much our old childhood mantra, wasn't it?

Winnipeg Damsel said...

Yes, yes it was. Heh.